Written by Chelsea Mize for Bustle. Originally published on June 10th, 2015.
“If you grew up as an avid-movie watcher, you probably soaked up some unrealistic expectations along the way. Perhaps the thing we have the most unrealistic expectations about thanks to Hollywood is sex. Though some movies do a better job than others in accurately depicting what sex is actually like, even the most realistic sex scenes are bound to demonstrate some inconsistencies. Hollywood taught us these 16 lies about sex and, as a woman and a writer, I feel obliged to expose these lies.
Whether it be how much the cost of living in New York City is or the possibility that you will run into your soulmate in a meet cute in a coffee shop, Hollywood likes to warp our expectations of reality. Sex is the cruelest expectation to play with because, by setting our standards too high, Hollywood is also setting people up to be disappointed in their sex lives.
Just in case anyone is out there wondering why they haven’t had romantic sex in a cornfield yet or why no one warned them that they might snap their tibia in half like a twig while having shower sex, I am here to give you some real talk about movie sex versus real life sex.
It is my sincerest hope that each of you will have enough great real life sex that you won’t ever feel like you’re being outdone by movie sex. But, just in case the sex scenes in moves have led you a bit astray, I’m here to set the record straight and expose all the lies Hollywood taught us about sex.
Foreplay? It’s Not That Great (Hint: It Is)
This is probably the most egregious crime committed by cinematic sex scenes: refusing to acknowledge how awesome (and necessary) foreplay is. You always see those couples in movies who meet, cast one sultry look at one another, and then, suddenly, there is full-on penetration before you can even say “Pass the lube.” It’s all about the foreplay, ladies and gents. Unless you want a sexual experience that is reminiscent of the Sahara desert on a particularly dry summer day, I suggest you let your girl warm up first.”
Click here to read the rest of the unrealistic sexpectations Hollywood has taught us!