Pro-sex. Pro-porn. Pro-knowing the difference.

Tired of Mainstream Porn? Check Out these Alternatives / The Ladies Finger

Written by Leena Vasu for The Ladies Finger. Originally published on July 6th, 2016.


I remember being really turned on when I watched Chuck and Blair make out in the backseat of a cab in the first season of Gossip Girl. I had told my friend, “I wish they made porn this way, then I’d watch it and enjoy it!” because I thought women could never enjoy porn even if they watched it. Much later, I found out that I was not the only one to fast forward the (so very long) blowjob scenes. At the same time, I also found a side of myself that watched porn in which women called themselves ‘sluts’ (in more than one language), and enjoyed submitting themselves to their misogynistic co-stars. It was uncomfortable that I enjoyed femdom videos, where women were being dominated by the fictitious male viewer. It even influenced my sex life; my partner and I would climax and then wonder how we could have possibly peaked to such offensive, horrific situations which we of course replicated from the Internet.

I really wanted to watch something that wouldn’t make me objectify myself, or make me satisfy someone else’s pleasure irrespective of my own comfort and discomfort. After hunting through several conversations on feminist porn on Reddit, I discovered a number of sites that make non-misogynistic adult films. You can continue to question whether porn can be feminist, but women watch porn too and want to enjoy it, so how do we make porn keeping this in mind? Here are a list of alternative porn sites you can look at:


Make Love Not Porn 

Started by Cindy Gallop in 2009, this site attempts to not only provide adult entertainment, but also educate its users on sex. It debunks myths on the way sex is portrayed in hardcore porn and shows “#realworldsex in all its glorious, silly, beautiful, messy, reassuring humanness”. What I really liked about this site is that it does not claim to be anti-porn nor is it saying that mainstream porn is bad; in this TED talk, Gallop herself admits to enjoying a lot of hardcore porn. Do not think that ‘making love’ means that the porn videos are any less bold or attempt to show gooey romance, it’s simply more realistic and leaves preferences up to individual choice. You can even upload your own videos and from the earnings you get in return, you can rent other videos from the site.


Head over to The Ladies Finger to see what other sites made the cut!

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